Its that time of the year

So its that time of the year again, when people are rushing to get their Christmas shopping done, getting their Christmas spirits on! Ho! Ho! Ho! But for some its that dreadful time of the year when they are reminded that they are all alone and they have no one to hold. As some prepare to go on happy holidays for this summer, some long to have something to eat. When some stress about gaining weight some wish they had food to eat. But for me its that time of the year when I prepare myself emotionally and spiritually for the next year!

Well it always last as a preparation but hopefully this year things will change and for the better. So as I stress about my exam results that are coming out in a few weeks time. My heart is anxious as I know my faith is about to grow. They all say you reap what you sow but God's miracles will be revealed. I am so excited to see my faith grow in Jesus Christ and in Heavenly Father! I know things may not always go my way but I know that He will be there for me in which ever way things go.

This year has been fun filling, met a lot of people who I will forever cherish and I have made some mistakes. At the moment I am on a journey of repentance. So far so good but uSATANA UYANDILINGA! I will not be dismayed and never, never from thee will I stray! 

God loves you the way you are!

A 54 year old woman had
a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.

While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God
she
asked "Is my time up?"

God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to
live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a
face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had
someone come in and change her hair colour and brighten her teeth! Since
she
had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the
most of
it.

After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While
crossing
the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.

Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had
another 43 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the
ambulance?"



(You'll love this)

God replied: "I didn't recognize you."


Motive of the story: God loves you the way you are.





HAVE A BLESSED DAY !!!!!!

Heart of Gratitude!!!

A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet. He
held up a sign which said: "I am blind, please help." There were only a
few coins in the hat..

A man was walking by. He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped
them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote
some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would
see the new words.
Soon the hat began to fill up. A lot more people were giving money to
the blind boy. That afternoon the man who had changed the sign came to
see how things were. The boy recognized his footsteps and asked, "Were
you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write?"



The man said, "I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a
different way."
I wrote: "Today is a beautiful day but I cannot see it."
Both signs told people that the boy was blind. But the first sign simply
said the boy was blind. The second sign told people that they were so
lucky that they were not blind. Should we be surprised that the second
sign was more effective?


Moral of the Story: Be thankful for what you have.. Be creative. Be
innovative. Think differently and positively.
When life gives you a 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1000
reasons to smile.


Face your past without regret.
Handle your present with confidence.
Prepare for the future without fear.


Keep the faith and drop the fear.
The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling...
And even more beautiful is, knowing that you are the reason behind it!!!

THOUGHTS... NOT JUST FOR TODAY... BUT EVERYDAY!!!

                         In life and love don't ever play games. If you
                         love someone, TELL them, if you don't.. TELL them,
                         the human heart is a very complex thing in that it
                         makes us do the strangest things when it reaches a
                         point of desperation especially when we are
                         hurting.
 
                         I'm sure many of us have reached that point where
                         we find ourselves attacking the competition "In
                         the name of Love" even attacking the object of
                         your affection, some of us have even found
                         ourselves hiding behind bushes or tagging the car
                         playing spy.
 
                         At the end of it, all relationships, whether
                         friendships or romance needs two elements to
                         survive- communication and compromise
 
                         And it needs another two elements to fall apart -
                         pride and stupidity. Too proud to say I'm sorry,
                         too proud to say I'm hurting, too proud to say I'm
                         feeling a little insecure.
 
                         And so stupid, stupid enough to let them go
                         because you think they will be back, stupid enough
                         not to tell them that you love them because you
                         think they will stick around longer if you play
                         hard to get, stupid enough to not answer their
                         calls when you have a fight because you want to
                         make them hurt and you want to teach them a lesson
                         they'll never forget...
 
                         Watch out you are not the one who learns a
                         lesson...
 
                         If its worth a great Person walking out of your
                         life, possibly for good.. then by all means Knock
                         yourself out.
 
                         But don't cry when that person never calls again,
                         or finds solace in another's arms. or throws them
                         self off of a twenty story building because the
                         pain you were causing them was too much to bear.
                         (stupid but serious)
 
                         Don't cry when a beautiful relationship is broken
                         and can't be fixed because YOU chose to play games
                         instead of laying your cards on the table and
                         working it out.
 
                         Say exactly what you feel and ask exactly what you
                         want to know. No matter how STUPID you sound... At
                         least you will know exactly where you stand.
 
                         And even if after you've poured your heart out and
                         it still doesn't work out..
 
                         You will be at peace because you know you did your
                         best on your part...
 
                         Your conscience will be clear and you will move on
                         knowing that you didn't go down without a fight.
 
                         Loving someone is not a game.
 
                         People are not pyramids... you can't go off on
                         your own selfish trip and expect to find them in
                         the exact same spot you left them weeks ago.
 
                         If you don't take care of your partners needs when
                         they need you to. What guarantee do you have that
                         somebody else won't?
 
                         So when you find your partner in your best
                         friend's arms or hear they are getting married to
                         someone you had guaranteed was just a "rebound
                         trip" three months after you let them Go without a
                         fight...
 
                         Don't cry... Coz while you were busy playing
                         games... Somebody else wasn't.
 
                         Love without reservations; live without
                         regrets………………!!!

Pictures!!!

Nothing looks better than BLUE

My sometimes crazy side

My first and Last love- my sister, Veekay and I

My sister, Veekay and I. Crazy Times

AM I BREAD? Then why am I in the bread oven?

Our shadows stick together too...

Typical day at work

Random day feeling pink

My second SEXUAL VIOLENCE protest. Emotional times

SEXUAL VIOLENCE = SILENCE

Typical day at home

Aint nothing better than our love...

One and the same...

Its been a while since I have posted something. Today as I was writing my exam a thought flushed into my head. I needed to know the answer to a question when my mind started to wonder around the exam hall... Head faced down, one with the paper, pens flowing like something was making sense...


Ow well, I thought about how we fight being so normal so hard. We love sticking out like sore thumbs forcing people to accept our uniqueness. Whoever said we needed to be different? Whoever said we needed gay people? Lesbians? Black, Coloured, Asian? Whoever said we ad to be different.


We have taken the definition of the word UNIQUE to a whole new level. According to the Oxford Dictionary unique is being the only one of its kind; unlike anything else. As people we are all the same just with not so similar features. We are different. But our 'different' has become a new word of which I can not find a meaning for...


Why do I force to be so different, why must I change my walks because I want to be noticed. Why must I speak like I have a lemon in my mouth just because I want to sound porch. Why must we all want to do things differently..? Whoever said simple was boring, not fun enough or even entertaining. Whoever said this person you are trying to be now is better than the person you were destined to be?


I used to be this open minded person- accepted that I will find gays and lesbians around, big, fat and thin people. I have always seen it as a test that God wants us all to accept people for who they are. For what they do and what they give. I have always used my acceptance recklessly. I have loved for having not been loved back because I knew it was what my Father in Heaven would have me do. 


Whoever said being different meant; changing my sexuality, hair colour, piercing my body and all other things we do to destroy the persons we are truly are?

*Sigh*

I hate feeling sad, I hate the feeling of disappointment and of not belonging somewhere. I hate feel sorry for someone. I know my heart is fragile and tiny. I care for all those who are around me and it breaks my heart deep down that people do not know their worth, how people sell themselves short for a moment's pleasure.

I am my mother's daughter and I am worth more than any man can offer me. I love him yes ow I do but I love myself more. I may not understand the true meaning of love nor know how it feels like to be truly loved but nothing hurts more than selling yourself short. What is a moment's pleasure worth?

There are many things in life we are not meant to understand, feel or appreciate. We hate others when they have never hurt us in any way possible. We lose ourselves in the mist in the attempt to fit into society's standards. To be accepted by those we put on the high seat...

Where has self worth gone to? What does it mean to have self worth? SELF WORTH?

We have come so far yet we are still were we have started. Back to where we swore we would never be again. Back at base one...

I think I really needed to vent out more than to write something with sense. I know it has been a while since I have posted something up. So here it goes: Ladies we are worth more than diamonds and gold. Money has no value on us. Lets not seek to be equals to men and seek to be above all that we do.

"According to thy Faith for I am bound"

So we go to sleep having no guarantee of tomorrow. We set our alarm clocks to wake us up each time. This is what faith is called. Having no perfect knowledge of all things but hoping and knowing that these things will happen.

So today I was lucky enough to wake up late for church and still have the burning desire to go. I took my shower in no rush may I add and got dressed, blow dried my hair and styled it. I guess you can see that I took my time. I left my room at the same time as the service was to start. I journeyed on and I got into a taxi. To my surprise it was playing gospel music.

In between the conversation I was having with the driver, I was lucky enough to get the message in the song. The song went something like this; " God will deliver unto us according to our faith". It got me to think How much is God bound unto me? How can I expect great miracles from Him yet I do not do my part?

I was hurt and I knew that today I did not need to go to church and listen to the speakers but the Lord had delivered His message unto me. I was shocked at my selfishness and shamed to even say I am a daughter of God. He only asks of us (me) to keep His commandments and He will bless us. We go to sleep having asked from Him great things yet to keep His commandment to LOVE ONE ANOTHER, we fail to do that.

Today my lesson did not come in a blue box with a red ribbon, it came with a man who drove a white quantum. God's message is waiting around you wrapped in all different shades. Be willingly to know and ye shall know.

Roles change

So through these past years, I have watched myself grow into this marvellous young woman. One whom is unshaken and remains strong. I have watched some of my friends grow in front of me- changing in all different forms and directions.

So I remember back in primary, first day of school. I met a girl named Lusanda Mdolo, who made my primary years worthwhile. She was with me through all those years- through the highs and the lows. She would change from time to time, and I'd also change but still we would remain. My heart was hers and I had her heart. But I could never accept that people would come and share of this friendship. I wanted it to be just us. I guess my jealousy tendencies were from birth!

Today I sit on this chair typing realizing that there is more to friendship than sharing secrets and keeping them to yourself. Friendship is not about whom you can trust to keep your secrets but rather than who will remain loyal. Someone that is going to love, care and nature your growth. Friends should be those people who will impact your life both positively and negatively but mostly hopefully just positively. Those people who will be there for you always even through distance and time...

Friendship mainly "ends" because of the misunderstanding that led to the friendship. And once friends now understand each other they breakup. We should not remember that we have each other in our lives when we need something. I've basically come a conclusion that the people we know in our lives do not disappear or leave us, but they roles just change. Like with our parents, when we were born they had to clean up after us, bathe us and feed us. Now that we all grown what are they to do? Roles change and that is something we need to accept in life. Change is good like a holiday. It is not a disease.

I have never claimed perfection

So its been a while and a lot has happened. It has been an eventful weekend, filled with mistakes and lessons learnt. I guess I still have a lot to learn about myself and things that mean or add value to the real me.

So right now I am really pissed at a certain someone- because I have never claimed perfection but a simple mistake has changed the person's view of me. Something I have noticed about people is that they are quick to judge you without knowing the real reason behind an event or an incident. Well I know I should also be a bit better but I can't help it at times... I know I can not also blame people for what they view of me because at the end of the day it is what I let them know, that they base their judgements on.

It hurts when the "little" someone thought of you is erased by something so stupid. So today at lunch I learnt a valuable lesson: Don't get attached because you can't claim your heart back. Have fun because in the end that is all that matters.

So what did I learn?

I guess that is the one question we always ask ourselves. Whether we have just got out of a bad relationship, lost our job, had a fight with our friend, broke an arm, failed a test, whatever it might be. WHAT DID I LEARN?
I ask this question as I know I have done a lot to have people question my morals, my being and my everything. I guess I have not completely been the person I want people to remember me by.


I have so many goals I had planned on achieving, places I wanted to go but I guess nothing everything goes as planned. So lesson 1) is that life never goes the way you had planned it to. But it happens the way it is meant to. I sit here today questioning my existence and my actions. Why did I do this? Was it necessary but I guess its not why I did it but rather why did God let it happen. So lesson number 2) is that things happen the way God wants them to happen. But my question still remains unanswered; what did I learn?So to answer my question without dragging this any further I learnt as much as you try to erase your past mistakes, they will always catch up to you.


Life is never what we make it out to be but rather what life is meant to be. So I end today on a sad note having learnt a difficult lesson- one which will haunt me in my grave. Past mistakes  will always shape your future but its up to you to stand UP tall after the great FALL.  

Day 2

So its day two and the sister is still confused about how this works. I am usually a fast learner when stuff involve technology. But it took about 30 minutes to figure out how to post a new blog. I guess in a few weeks time I will be laughing at how ridiculous I was.

So my day started out as any other day. But today was different because I was fasting. I have faith that the Lord will deliver me through and that through His grace I will achieve this. At this point I do not feel like sharing my story but only time will tell if this story is a story worth sharing. But I know at the end of this day I will be nothing but all smiles.

Today I am wearing a skirt I never wear, one I had bought specially to wear at my late brother's funeral. So today I am feeling really special.
Words for the day: If you ask  in FAITH, BELIEVING and TRUSTING in God with all thy might and will He will deliver you through.

See, this is how fast I am, I have just figured out how to add images to my post.. :)

This is IT!

So I have always been saying to myself and the very few fortunate people around me, that I need to start my own blog. So today I had the courage to do it. And here goes my first post and I really do not know what to say.

I have a lot on my mind right now and I do not know if I should be getting hectic at my first go. Today has not been a pretty great day for me. Things changed without me even noticing. The greatest thing I thought I had yet achieved this year will be soon lost tomorrow if I do not fight for it. At first I did not want it but as soon as my friend said go for it, my heart, body and soul were all in it. Too just lose it like that, will surely not feel good. I am teary eyed as I think of it but I know God has a plan and He will see me through.

As I am getting carried away on my first I attempt I have forgotten to mention that tomorrow is the day before my test of which I need to study for. And with that said I guess its time I sign out and attend my books.

>huge sigh<  I hope I get the hang of things as soon as possible...